My Boy

my two favorite pictures: 6 days old and just a few months under 3 years old

Ezra Wallace.

He is 3 years and 3 months old.

My boy.

It baffles me to think that it has only been a little over 3 years ago when Ezra came screaming into the world (click here for my recollection of his birth. It was pretty intense at the time and still scares me some days recalling those memories...). He was so tiny and adorable. And very chubby eventually. He was such a good-tempered, calm baby.

he's our little water dog. We need to visit our Florida family soon because this poor kid has been begging to go to the beach!

And then he grew and he grew, and developed the best personality ever. I love his imagination and creativity. And his memory! The other day, I was watching this awesome video of The Piano Guys (piano and cello duo) playing their amazing music on the Great Wall of China (please let me go there someday, please, please, please!) and without mentioning it to Ezra, he looked up at me and asked if I was watching Kung Fu Panda, which was what they were playing! It has been months since we watched that and I'm pretty sure I've watched it more than he has and could not recognize that song right off.

Each week I have to clear photos on my phone, but I tend to do screen shots so I won't forget my goofy boy's faces

He had a word explosion right before he turned 3. Suddenly he went from a few short sentences and a few handfuls of words to complex question and LOTS of opinions. It is so fun to talk to him. He will talk your ear off if you let him, but he will mostly be happy if you pretend to go on jungle adventures with him or play hide and go seek (which he is terrible at because he always says "I'm here!!" when I say "hmm, where could Ezra be?" Ha. love it!).


I thought my most trying time as parent was tackling potty training. You must think I'm silly, but it was awful for me. I started trying when he turned 2 and then kept postponing every few weeks because he just wasn't "getting" it. If there's one thing I learned from this whole experience, it's that what "they" say is true: "if they're not ready, they are not ready." There is no magical age when each child is ready to be potty trained, but for Ezra, turning 3 and waiting 2 months seemed to do the trick. He's great at telling me when he needs to go now and we "run! run! run!" as quickly as we can no matter where we are at to make it to the potty. I'm so proud of him and SO glad that the accidents are rare these days. In just a few weeks, it'll be Vivienne's turn because she loves the potty!

big fan of the birds- tattoos, outfit (courtesy of Shnooks) and of course an angry bird birthday cake. The things we do for love :)

At this very moment, Ezra's favorites are:
- shows: Go, Diego, Go! and Dora the Explorer

- food: apples, bananas, grapes, dried apricots, pizza, and gummies. Though I must add that he is no longer the picky eater he once was. He'll eat just about anything if we tell him he needs to finish it (which makes meal time so much easier these days). He has to at least take one bite of a new food.

- activities: building block towers and "crashing" them, playing hide and go seek, exploring outside and collecting sticks and jumping in puddles, stealing dad's iPad to "crash" the angry birds or catch the bad guys (clash of the clans. nerrrrrd), pretending to be a robot, Diego, or a monster, and adding "Bobby" to the end of everyone's name (Ex. mommy-bobby, daddy-bobby, grandpa-bobby, etc.) Cracks me up every time!

love me some toddler selfies, especially the kissy-kissy lips!

He says the sweetest things.

me "I love you, Ezra"
ezra "I love you mooooore, Mommy."

and lately,

"I love my body! I love my body! I love your body too, mom. You too, Vivi"

"I really like your hair, mommy" (usually this is when it's a curly hot mess)

so sweet with his pancake; not so sweet dumping green food coloring all over himself and the couch.

Some days it can be the great battle of Mommy vs. Ezra, but I love him to pieces and love how much he's grown. Despite me missing his baby stage, I am thoroughly enjoying having him grow up. I look forward to the years to come and to see his already huge and inviting personality to just shine. I love thinking about the relationship he and Carl have and how much he will learn and absorb from Carl- fixing cars, building our home, learning about electricity and why the heart beats the way it does. I love that he and Vivienne play together so well and that he's learning to protect her and take her hand when necessary. He is such a good brother.


Ezra, you mean the world to us and we love you to the moon and back and more!

Westward Ho! Again.

I have been loving this weekend! The LDS Church holds two conferences every six months and this is THE weekend. If you have the chance and would like to listen/watch some uplifting talks, well, check it out!

Back to the original post,

Two weeks after leaving Oregon, the children and I came to California for 10 days. You may be wondering why Carl did not accompany me on this trek. Well, it was not by choice, but since he is an over-time student (get it? he eats, breaths, lives in PA school thus making him greater than full-time), he was unable to join. I will save the traveling-with-toddlers for my next post as it was an interesting experience...

I came to California was because it was Grandpa Lockwood's 90th birthday! Grandpa is a wonderful man. He grew up during the Great Depression, is a WWII veteran, has an amazing memory, and I always loved hearing him tell me about his life. While he tells a story about his life, it is so simply stated and yet so full of detail. It was so wonderful to come celebrate in person for this huge milestone! I also loved visiting with my dear one and only sister, my brother in law, my parents of course, and my sister from anotha' mister, Steph. Good times, everyone, good times.

visiting a nearby park

down, down, down

perfection.

top: grandpa (dad) trying to show ezra some tricks. Good effort! bottom: father and son

GOOB

bonding with grandchildren

chaotically trying to take a picture of grandpa and the great grand babies. note: my dad's furry arm. also note: shnooks, I'm sorry your eye has a weird shadow over it.

Somehow I managed to take more pictures of Vivienne. Oh well, it evens out the previous 2 years before Vivi was born ;)

And now for some eye candy:

the new bay bridge, SF

capturing the beauty of my mom's exotic garden she takes such good care of

And how could I resist snapping a picture of dumb things teenagers vandalize and say?

California, you will always have my heart.

Good Tidings!

For those who's emails I don't have, here is our Christmas Newsletter and Card!

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December 24, 2012

Dear Family and Friends!

Another Christmas, another year- yes, it’s that time of year that your random relative, favorite child, old roommate, or new acquaintance mails you a picture and newsletter! Well, e-mail in our instance.

We are doing well all the way out here in Wisconsin! SO many changes have occurred since we’ve moved out here – as easy as it is for me to write a book about our life in just the past 14 months we’ve been here, I’ll save you the saga, and share a little about each of us.

We moved out here initially because Carl was accepted to a cardiovascular perfusion program last year. We were both so excited to come out and start again on a new career path! However, as Carl continued in the program, he realized that due to his personable nature, spending the rest of his career inside an operating room just did not seem right. And I whole-heartedly agreed. So, though an extremely difficult decision, we decided to pull out of the program. Now, he has been fulfilling pre-requisites for physician assistant (PA) programs! What?! More school? Like I said, Carl is such a personable guy. And smart! We said, “why not?” I would just like to take a moment and brag- PA school is incredibly difficult to get in, let alone get an interview. Among 1,600 applicants, 300 receive interview offers and each school varies in the seats they have per program. That is why I am SO proud he has TWO interviews already lined up after the New Year! Way to go, Carl! We are praying school starts this year, but whatever it takes to get in is our current motto.  Whew! Now that that’s out of the way, Carl turned the ripe old age of 30 and has been ever so helpful at watching the kidlets while I rest after work. His favorite things are a good nights rest (every parent’s dream), opportunities to ride his bike or jog, a new pair of shoes, wrestling with Ezra, and watching a great action flick on his new 50” TV. Least favorite things: stinky rancid milk spit up from Vivienne on a fresh shirt that’s just been changed into and my blood curdling scream when I see a spider.

I, Tracey, have been doing quite well myself! I have been working in an emergency department as an RN for the past 10 months (minus six weeks of maternity leave) and I love it! I work nights and I must say, the patients who come in during the wee hours of the night continue to keep me entertained. I am so grateful to finally have nursing job I love and don’t want to pull my hair out while there! Besides work, I still enjoy sewing and cooking a good meal, though between kids and work, I find sleep consumes most of my time in-between.  My favorite things include hearing my babies laugh, chatting with Carl before bed, and a good chocolate dessert. My least favorite things include my detest for this mullet hair I have due to trying to grow it out this upcoming year, trying to come up with dinner when I don’t meal plan, and having Ezra pull my hand and say “mess!” only to find that yes, there is cornstarch all over the living room and piano.

Ezra is now the ripe old age of TWO! 29 months to be exact. He is freakin’ hilarious! Finally, the chatting phase has arrived. He loves to ask questions, can count to 12, almost says his ABCs correctly (does “A B E E E F E” count?), and like his mother, enjoys singing, dancing to all music varieties, and anything involving music. Many who attended to Venegas wedding can testify of his awesome dance moves. Ezra has such a bright light in his eyes. Even strangers notice and stop to tell us! He is incredibly intelligent and a great problem solver. He is making great strides in potty training as well – I know how curious you all are about his current bowel and bladder patterns. A few of his current favorite things include covering himself with our couch pillows and hiding, finding pens and markers to draw anywhere, watching the Backyardigans, playing rough with Dad, and “helping Vivi” whenever possible. His least favorite things include naptime, being told “no” and coming inside after being outside.

Vivienne Chan Leder – what a doll baby! She is now NINE months! I can hardly believe her one year birthday is nearing! She makes the sweetest little baby sounds every day. She has been rolling around mostly to get to things, knows how to “army-crawl,” but prefers to scream and make us tote her around. We call her our little parrot for that very reason of constantly hanging on to one of our shoulders. Vivienne, or “Vivi” as we mostly call her, seems like she will be walking before she crawls as she loves to pull herself to standing anywhere she can clasp her little pincers onto. I say pincers because those ruthless little fingers will most definitely find their way to the most tender skin on your arm, your collarbone, and a few unspeakable places as well. She is following her brother’s footsteps in being a chunky little thang with the many fat bracelets up her arms and down her legs. I could nibble on her little round cheeks all day!  Favorites: being held all day, having mom-and-dad-time-ONLY, my phone, and playing with whatever Ezra has. Least favorites: being buckled in the car seat, not being held and walked around, and being forced to wear a diaper.

Merry Christmas and a Happy New Year! May you continually remember the reason for this season and achieve all your resolutions by next Christmas ;)

Love,

Carl, Tracey, Ezra, and Vivienne 

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I'm back.

I've purposely neglected this blog the last few weeks because a) I wanted to soak up every little bit of family time I had before going back to work, which happens to be tonight, b) I had parental and sibling visits galore, c) the house needed much attention after said visits, and d) why would I blog when my babies are growing up before my very eyes?!

So much to update on, but I really don't want to take up a ginormous chunk of time typing. All my babies (including the big one named Carl) are napping, so here is an update:

Vivienne

Glorious little Vivienne. What a dolly. She is such a night owl from 10 pm to midnight every night and is a champion eater. She has almost doubled her birth weight! She went from the 25th percentile at two weeks old to 75th at her one month appointment (she is now almost 11 lbs!). Following her big brother's lead :) I am just amazed at how fast she has grown- 6+ weeks already. Ahhh babies. I love her brown hair, her newborn grey eyes, her sweet puckery lips, and chubby little hammies. I could give her kisses all day.

Ezra

Oh my firstborn, what a handsome little man he has become. He is so smart and constantly amazes us. He is finally choosing to use words and has even used two word sentences! He knows his "please's" and "thank you's," purposely gets into trouble so that we chase him around the house, loves kiss attacks, loves to watch and chase the cottontail bunnies in our courtyard, and is very helpful around the house. He will throw tantrums here and there, but Carl and I have learned that his tantrums are more for us to learn patience and grow as parents than for Ezra to learn not to throw them. It's a phase that he will out grow soon enough. He is such a daddy's boy! Some of his favorite and inappropriate things Carl has taught him is to say "Eat it!", "Bite it", and "ca-ca" hahaha. What a boy.

Parents

tired. happy. sometimes edgy and borderline crazy (that one might just be me). Recovery has pretty much been amazing and miraculous this time. I even got mastitis twice- bleh! But even then, I have been able to physically do so much more than with Ezra. The body is amazing. Carl has been fantastically helpful. I think I would die from just being overwhelmed if he didn't help at all. He just about changes every diaper during the night while I groggily get out of bed to feed Vivienne and frequently makes me breakfast or lunch. sometimes even dinner haha.

 I go back to work tonight and I feel so bittersweet about it all. I am just so grateful that I will be going back on night shift so that I have the peace of mind that my family is sleeping (or eating) while I am away. Ezra will wake up in the morning as I come in through the doors. It will be as if I stepped out to get the mail or do the laundry. I am eager to get my skills back up and going and to continue to learn learn learn. I really love my job as a nurse.

one of my favorites of Viv and me. 3 weeks old

little girly

my boys

many more updates to come, for now, this will have to do :)

Snow Day!

I've neglected my audience for almost two weeks now. So here is an update/brain dump:


"Guess what. I have a bunion."

"I thought only old people get those."

"Yeah, me too. I guess 23 is old age."

"Bummer."


This is the conversation I had with myself as I discovered I have a bony prominence literally growing on my right big toe's joint. I noticed a lot of my shoes had been causing me pain the past several weeks, but I ignored it because pregnancy does funny things to feet. But then there was that tiny little bump... and it grew. And now it's just a small bump. Enough to bug the heck out of me if I'm wearing any shoe but the upholstered Dansko clogs my aunt gave me. I have tried on, purchased, and returned more shoes in the last 2 months than ever before in my whole life. All I have to say is LAME. And I'm really going to miss all my stillettos and cute flats that I can't fit anymore.

By the way, bunions aren't crusty and nasty like I thought they were. Old people feet are that way from years of poor fitting shoes and callouses. Not my tender little feet.


Aside from that sour news, this past Saturday night through Monday night included a bout of food poisoning for me, so that was a blur. I recovered fairly quickly, but I have been very weary of leftovers since...

And aside from that sour news too, Wednesday was great because... it was Leap Day! I've always been fascinated with Leap Year- I love that it's every four years! Carl and I were married last leap year (we should have planned it so that it was actually on leap day!) and now, four years later, we are where we could never have imagined. I wanted to make it a special day, but with recovering from food poisoning, I was a little limited on time and resources. Nonetheless, Carl and I wrote Leap Day letters to ourselves, Ezra, and this bun in the oven... to be opened in four years! I'm excited to keep up with this tradition. I love reminiscing and I love letters. Perfect combination for Leap Day 2016.

Work has been great. I love how much I'm learning, though I still feel really dumb a lot of days. I work with such talented and quick thinking people. I feel almost intimidated by how good they are at their job. But I continue to try and absorb as much as I can, asking questions  when I really need to, and try to jump in and gain experience in my weak areas. Like IVs. Some days I do great and start all my IVs on the first try. Other days, I profusely apologize to the patient for poking them twice and failing. oops.

Yesterday the snow came down again. I'm a little tired of this confused winter, but I'm happy that it has been a very mild one. The snow is going to just melt away in a few days.Woot. Today, Ezra finally got a chance to play in the snow (he's walked around snow, just hasn't played in it. You know, snow balls, snow angels, etc.). He's been sick every time it snows the first time and by the time he's recovered, the snow is partway melted already. I even managed to capture the moment!

such a handsome little ham

Wah. My winter coat did not fit this winter.

I love the way freshly fallen snow looks on barren trees. So pretty.

Alrighty, so there you go, an update :)

In case you haven't done so, predict a gender and birthdate for babe #2! See this previous post for more info: http://teamleder.blogspot.com/2012/02/prediction.html

8 weeks 'til D-Day.

Scary to think that I only have 8 weeks (I'm 32 weeks tomorrow) until my official due date! We don't have anything ready this time. I mean anything. Names, outfits, bassinet, who will watch Ezra if I go into labor before 4/4/2012 (when my mama comes!), newborn diapers... yeah, nothing. I actually don't feel worried, but at the same time, we really need to pull things together haha. It's also amazing how little time we spend planning for something this life changing when we have a little guy already- last pregnancy, I went to school, gradutated, and then studied for the NCLEX... but any "down time" Carl and I had, we would talk about plans for Ezra's arrival. Oh well. It'll all work out- it always does :)

I'll be preparing a blog post soon with a contest regarding Babe #2's d-day and gender... exciting stuff!

look closely. he has a waterfall under his nose.

This poor guy has been battling a cold, possible ear infection (again), and possible teething (also again). I stayed home with him today instead of going to church because he was so miserable this morning. Poor babe. Doesn't he look so pitiful?

So out of it...

My first week of work was highly uneventful for the most part since it was all classroom lectures. However, I did get to go into the ER one day to shadow a tech. In that time, I saw a person come in after overdosing by swallowing a transdermal narcotic patch, a few chest pain complaints, lots of UTIs and bowel issues, and a few colds. Fairly eventful and I'm excited to actually do more nurse-related things this week!

Carl is doing well- he has been working hard on his hardcore juicing cleanse/diet. His hardwork is showing too! He has lost 7 lbs since he started about 15 days ago! Here are the posts if you're interested in reading about his progress: http://harmonizedlaughter.blogspot.com/search?q=juicing


Hope everyone is doing well and avoiding the illness monster!

She works hard for her money.

I started work today and it wasn't too bad, somewhat boring. Mostly because we sat on our butts watching slideshows and videos, but still, not bad. I find that I get a lot of mixed reactions from people when they hear I'm working. It's either a "yay! so glad you can work where you want to!" or a "oh, I'm sorry. I would hate to be away from my kids that long. Is there anything you need?" I think the latter response is the more common one, but I know that it comes from good intentions. I agree, it is hard to choose to be away from Ezra, but I chose to go into a field that is more than a "back-up" degree. A nursing career does not have a very long shelf life when not working/volunteering/going to school. It requires experience not only to be useful, but to often keep a license active (I think many of my nurse friends and family who are also moms will really "get" what I mean). Nonetheless, I love that I'm a nurse and look forward to the experience I'll be gaining in the ER!

Carl and Ezra went to the allergy appointment and it was very uneventful and really not needed to be honest. Ezra didn't have to get poked (yay!) and the doctors basically just said to watch his allergy. Whyyyyy did the pediatrician have us go to an allergist for something this mild?! Ok. Anyway, the good news is that he will probably overcome his allergies (minus the amoxycillin allergy) in the next year or so. For now, we will be on the watch and continue to carry epi pens.

Glad to be home with the family this evening, back to the grind tomorrow!




Oh, and if it seems like I'm not as active on Facebook anymore, it's because I'm not. I deleted the app off my phone so I wouldn't be so tempted to check it so often. 2-3 min each check really adds up the hours of waste each week! I also deleted the pinterest app. I did sign up for instagram... but so far I'm only following my sister and her fiance haha. It's time to stop letting social networks take up too much time in my life!

I Spy... a babe.

Or maybe a pair of creepy parents (stalkers)?

We updated our baby monitoring system to a video surveillance camera (literally surveillance- we bought a security camera. much better quality than a fancy video baby monitor and waaaay cheaper (check out amazon)). We watched Ezra fall asleep tonight.

Seriously 10 weeks to go?

As many of you readers are also loyal facebook friends, you will probably have noticed I posted a very pregnant-looking picture of myself this week. Take a moment and notice the difference between 30 weeks with Ezra and 30 weeks with this babe:

 I am carrying out much more this time and my back and pelvis feel every bit of it. However, thanks to my maternity belt purchase, it hasn't been too bad as long as I get adequate rest each night (which Carl has allowed me to get by letting me sleep in almost everyday :)

We had fun taking pictures on Sunday after dinner. I love my little [growing] family!

he's like an asian carl, right?!

love love love that we are making the same face

just needed to showcase the brown eyes he inherited from me :)

YARG!!! We tend to say this at dinner time with forks, but he's happy to say it with blocks too

Being "soft" to the baby

he surprised me by giving the baby a kiss too!

Yay!

And the who's the goober now?

happy day!


ps- i'll be reporting on Carl's juicing halfway mark tomorrow on our other blog. woot.

A jumble of thoughts

I used to think "preggo brain" was a fake symptom. Maybe more of an excuse. I'm sorry if that is offensive, but it just seemed fake.

Until this pregnancy. I swear, I have said to Carl or myself "what was I doing again?" or "why am I looking in here?" more than I can even come close to counting. Or those random spurts of forgetfulness where I have somewhere to go and I have reminders on my phone and paper calendar and I still manage to not remember until I look at the clock, ask myself "am I supposed to do something right now?" and then frantically scramble out the door. It must be karma for having it too easy the first time.

I have been blogging up a storm on my crafty blog lately! It's been fun. I hope to add a few more crafty projects on top of the tasty experiments. And hopefully some interesting nursing experiences in the ER!

Speaking of ER, I start orientation in a little over a week! It's all classroom lectures the first week, but I am still so excited! Also very nervous for once I'm in the ER... what if someone codes?! And I'm still bummed about orientation being during the day- I'll miss my boys too much! But the rest will be nice :)

Ezra has been booming since my last update about him- he says a lot more words now and will try to repeat more often! He is so funny! He loves to tickle me or pretend to give me a toy car only to take it away quickly and cackle mischieviously as he runs off, convincing me that my only option is to chase after him. He also loves to give out kisses to us every night (usually. sometimes a bad mood will deny us kisses) and I like to demand kisses and hugs during the day because they are so sweet- this is usually 50/50. He'll firmly tell me NO if I ask too frequently.

Anyway, it is bedtime for the parents now, so enjoy my thoughts and the pictures below:

he automatically does the "cheeser" face for pictures now. I can hardly ever record a video without him holding this face for the first 10 seconds haha

I can't tell who he looks like more! Anyway, we thought this outfit was hilarious. We deemed him the country hunting bumpkin. His crocs are even camo!

a little blurry, but still handsome :)

crazy hair day!

If you ever need to buy toddler/kids shoes, payless shoes are the way to go. So cheap and great quality!

It's Good To Be a Mom

In the last two days, there have been two articles floating around facebook and I could not resist helping them float.

The first article was funny. I'll admit that the author's use of "Carpe Diem" is a little off- I mean, really? Don't Seize the Day? But I really loved the general message and that she was willing to be blatantly honest (something I've always been and dinged for haha :) and admit that motherhood is a challenge and it is completely normal to be frustrated some days. Sometimes we need 10 minutes to recompose ourselves, other times it's a date night. It was a breath of fresh air, and one I thoroughly enjoyed. I think it tickled me more because I used to always have all these people who would tell me to not cook, clean, wash dishes, etc and just hold Ezra all. day. long. Riiiiiiiight. On many occasions, I choose playing over chores, but isn't a clean house and cooking a decent dinner for the whole family refreshing?

The second article was just plain sweet. I thought it was just an extra sweet version of the first article and so kind to new moms. She says it plain and clear- being a mom (or parent really) is hard work, especially for the first child. Being a new mom is a whole new reality that you can never imagine and it is so normal to be tired, confused, and even frustrated with the unknown and new. It helps me to appreciate even more all the stages of life I will encounter in the near future.

Elder Joseph B. Wirthlin, former member of the quorum of 12 shared a general conference address that I think hits home with everyone. The title, Come What May, and Love It. The title says it all and is something Carl and I have adopted into our family. Sometimes things just happen and you can be mad about them or you can just choose to let it go, maybe even roll your eyes, laugh, and move on. It's good to remember that saying. We don't have cherish every single moment that ever was, but just take them for what they are, learn from them, and love the growth that comes from the outcome.


Being a parent has been a blessing and another trial that has brought Carl and I even closer :)


Have a fantastic day, everyone :) I started my day off preparing for my Sunday School lesson and drinking hot chocolate. I think water should have followed breakfast because I've been feeling mighty dry. Carl and I plan to have a nice relaxing day with Ezra and babe #2 (who seems very dissatisfied with the cramped quarters of the uterus hotel).

EEEE ARRRRRRR

The title is pronounced "E" "R" which is announcing that I just got a job in the ER! Woohoo I am excited. It'll be a challenge, but so exciting and rewarding. Have I ever mentioned how grateful we are for my nursing degree? It has been a blessing in our family, especially in the last year!

Another announcement, Ezra's tree nut allergy panel results came back. This kid has a peanut, cashew, and almond allergy. Blah! I never thought he would be an allergy kid. So I scheduled an appointment with the referred allergist for more testing. Sigh. I hate that he will be poked and prodded and not know why.

While driving around today, Carl stepped into a Jimmy Johns. He came back smelling like a sandwich, so I told him he smelled so good I could take bite of him. I must be pregnant because I'm pretty sure there is nothing tremendously sexy about smelling like a toasted turkey sandwich.

It's been lightly dusting the last 8 hours. Welcome, winter.


Life is good :)

Just for old time sakes :) This was taken almost a year ago. I could nibble up those little fat rolls on his arms!